


Never

by Akaihyou



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Bittersweet Ending, F/M, Fix-It of Sorts, Gen, Missing Scene, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-01
Updated: 2019-05-01
Packaged: 2020-02-10 17:38:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18665182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akaihyou/pseuds/Akaihyou
Summary: The thing is, Bucky Barnes would never begrudge Steve Rogers a happy ending.CAUTION: MAJOR ENDGAME SPOILERS





	Never

The thing is, Bucky Barnes would never begrudge Steve Rogers a happy ending.

“I saw her, Buck,” Steve tells him. “So close we were almost face-to-face. God, she was...”

It’s less than a week since… everything, and things have finally settled down enough to give them some time together. Bucky expected he still might not really know how to talk to Steve these days, but _these days_ is sort of questionable now. Seems all he needed was another instance of opening his eyes years after closing them. Being dust wasn’t a patch on the old cryo process, but he understands why it was so much worse for those left in the timestream. A lot happened in those six years, as always happens when Bucky blinks away more time. Steve’s learned to live with loss. He’s had time to think. Bucky and Sam used to be his best friends. Natasha was Steve’s new best friend by virtue of time and shared experience. Some of the desperation with which Steve used to regard him is gone. Peggy, however… Peggy Carter was the love of Steve’s life. He’ll carry a torch for her forever if Bucky knows him at all anymore.

“Didya think about staying?” Bucky asks. He can imagine it well enough: a reality in which Steve walked into SHIELD, at Lehigh, right into Peggy’s office. Steve could have been happy with Peggy. In the past, they could have had a future.

For a long minute, Steve doesn’t answer.

“It’s--” _Okay_ , Bucky wants to tell him, but Steve cuts him off.

“Yes,” Steve blurts, squeezing his eyes shut as he turns his face away.

Guilty, probably. Steve’s always been stupid like that.

“God, Buck,” Steve sighs out. “You don’t know. I thought about staying longer than I thought about changing things the first time in 2012.”

The pain he feels is written right across his stupid face.

“The first time. When you pretended to be HYDRA and then got taken for Loki by yourself and used my survival as a distraction tactic,” says Bucky, not quite doing his best to flatten his expression into something less than amused.

Steve snorts ruefully, but he’s looking at Bucky’s face again. “So much for not changing things.”

“Yeah, well,” says Bucky, raising his right hand and punching him lightly in the shoulder, “this world doesn’t seem to have ended. Maybe that one even ends up better.”

“Maybe,” Steve repeats.

Sensing his friend’s imminent fall into melancholy, Bucky changes the subject. “I got the impression Pepper’s keeping her armor.”

“Codename: Rescue,” Steve confirms. “Emergencies only.”

“Here’s hoping there aren’t too many of those in the future,” Bucky says.

“Yeah,” Steve agrees softly. Then his face scrunches up into grimace again. “Hey, Bucky, if I hadn’t come back…”

“Half the universe would be dust,” says Bucky, “but I wouldn’t blame you. If anyone deserves a time machine, it’s you.”

Even more unhappily, Steve asks, “What about you?”

“I couldn’t do it,” Bucky admits. “I can’t go back. This me is made to go forward.”

“You always did live for the promise of the future,” Steve muses.

 

* * *

 

Bucky is half-expecting it when Banner flips the switches and Steve doesn’t reappear on the platform. There’s the immediate bolt of fear, but then he hears that Steve blew past his date and relaxes even before he notices the figure on the bench. Steve’s alive and here. He wouldn’t leave them to wonder or assume the worst.

He’s not sure how well he’ll handle Steve looking _old_ , though, so he pushes Sam forward. He never thought he’d get to see Steve old. First, because Steve wouldn’t have lived long enough, and then because Bucky couldn’t see himself surviving the war. Until this moment, that had held true enough.

On the topic of things Bucky never imagined he’d see, he can’t help but wonder about Mjolnir. Back to Asgard with the hammer itself, but Steve called _lightning._ A thing like that has gotta leave some mark. He said he used the scepter too. Maybe he won’t have aged so much.

But no, Bucky’s good at estimating that sort of thing, never mind that it’s a little more difficult from the back.

If Steve’s safe and settled and happy, Bucky can find his own way forward. That’s part of the bittersweet kindness of giving Sam the shield. Bucky would have taken it, but he doesn’t want it. It has too many expectations attached.

Sooner than Bucky is prepared for, it’s his turn. There’s a long silence. Neither of them says a word as they drink in the details of each other’s appearance. Steve looks happy. He looks… serene. Bucky’s never seen this expression on his face. It looks good on him.

“I had a date,” Steve says. “Stepped on her toes and everything.”

“You got your dance?” asks Bucky. “Found the right partner?”

Steve smiles that never-before-seen smile. “We got all the dances, Buck.”

He’d never expected he and Steve would grow old together. It’s a blessing that Steve’s lived long enough to grow old at all. It’s a miracle that he can grow old. He is old, though. His joints pop and his bones creak as he stands for a hug and Bucky doesn’t hold too tight for fear of crushing him. Steve’s delicate again, inside. Human.

Maybe he’ll ask for more details, or maybe he won’t. He can grieve his own losses later. It’s a hurt, but one of many he’s learned to live with. Not as final as most. What matters is that Steve’s lived and learned to let go. This is what peace must feel like. Bucky doesn’t have to worry about him anymore.

No, Bucky Barnes could never begrudge Steve Rogers a happy ending.


End file.
